Separating

Earlier this week I undertook a project I had too long neglected: the simple task of organizing the papers I spent five years of college writing.
Why didn't I just throw them in a box, I kept asking myself. Or better yet, chuck 'em?
I hoped these papers would serve as a chronicle of my journey of the written word, and also a comfort in knowing that not everything I have written has ended up in the trash bin before reaching completion.
But why did it take so long?
I discovered that the delay stemmed from an issue of control. That and a little disease we call procrastination.

If you're like me, you like things to appear neat and orderly. Sometims I spend half my days off organizing the house so I can get twenty minutes of writing done. A pathetic ratio of productivity, but how can I expect to have a clear mind when everything around me is cluttered with "life"?

The simple truth is that life is seldom neatly separated, which makes it difficult to come across life altruisms. No subject is simply "black" or "white." There will always be a darker black and a brighter white, you know?

So I have come to accept that if I just pick up the pen and run with what's in my head, I might not say precisely what I mean to say, at least not at first. Someone else is bound to have a more definitive, educated opinion. They might even--gasp!--disagree with me.

Even so, one of my fondest memories when writing for the Digest one semester at Trinity College was when a female student told me she had read my latest article, an opinion piece on Michael Jackson.
"Oh good!" I said, beaming that someone had given my writing the time of day.
"Yeah," she responded, as a thoughtful expression came accross her face. "I don't think I liked it."
It's natural to become defensive when someone challenges our opinions, the paradigms we have constructed which rule our world.
But the reward for someone's response after having thought about what you said is well worth it.

So here's to not holding on so tightly to categories. Different opinions are what make life a many-colored experience.